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Funny
Jun 29, 2005 23:33:09 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Bear-{3-D} on Jun 29, 2005 23:33:09 GMT -5
Post away!
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Funny
Jul 9, 2005 10:57:42 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*Shadow on Jul 9, 2005 10:57:42 GMT -5
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Funny
Jul 29, 2005 23:00:33 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Bear-{3-D} on Jul 29, 2005 23:00:33 GMT -5
Do you know what I think is funny? .... People that do very little for the clan and cop an attitude as if we all owe them something. The members that donate to our server are the ones who deserve special treatment because most of the clan RIDES ON THEIR SHIRTAILS!!! I know....some people have bills...and can not donate to keep our server up but I did not fall off the turnip wagon yesterday....when you start talking about pennies a day, you really spent too much time around your Grandparents and are an anti-social nerd or maybe you are just cheap.....either way...just get with it and if you have not earned it ....do not claim it! If not for your own pride do it for the DbD members that do donate. Lets ALL carry our own weight!
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ZeroSignal
New Member
Evil is as Evil does.....
Posts: 9
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Funny
Aug 4, 2005 15:11:45 GMT -5
Post by ZeroSignal on Aug 4, 2005 15:11:45 GMT -5
this really isnt funny, its more of appreciation.....
Bear, thanks for all the work you have done to improve the servers and the website. I know you dont have the time to play as much as you used to, and the fact that you put your time in shows your dedication to the clan.
thanks for the great clan!!!! ;D
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Funny
Aug 23, 2005 17:21:49 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Bear-{3-D} on Aug 23, 2005 17:21:49 GMT -5
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in South Louisiana. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going into retrieve it."
The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Louisiana. We rule ourselves under the Napoleonic Code. We settle small disagreements like this with the Louisiana Three Kick Rule."
The lawyer asked, "What is the Louisiana Three Kick Rule?" The Farmer replied. "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."
The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller.
His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees where he immediately vomited.
The geezer's second kick nearly ripped the man's nose off his face.
The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.
The lawyer summoned every bit of his dark heart, vengeful will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot now it's my turn."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."
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Funny
Aug 24, 2005 23:47:49 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*Shadow on Aug 24, 2005 23:47:49 GMT -5
lol. How about some puns!?
Camping is in-tents
Bill: In Florida I mainly just slept on the beach. I got sunburned but now I at least have a nice tan. Tanner: Ha! But you'll neve be tanner than me.
OK, puns suck.
A terrorist hi-jacks a bus full of lawyers and threatens to release one every hour if his demands arn't met.
A blonde died her hair brown because she was tired of being picked on, She was driving along the countryside when she got a bright idea and stopped at a nearby farm. she said to the farmer "If i can tell you how many sheep you have in total can I have one?" "ok" said the farmer, so she quickly counted them and said 91. The farmer looked around astonished and said "alright take one" As she was walking back to her car the farmer said "If i can guess your natural hair colour can i have my dog back?"
Two campers were hiking in the forest when all of a sudden a bear jumps out of a bush and starts chasing them. Both campers start running for their lives, when one of them stops and starts to put on his running shoes. His partner says, "What are you doing? You can't outrun a bear!"
His friend replies, "I don't have to outrun the bear, I only have to outrun you!"
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noob
New Member
Posts: 5
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Funny
Sept 8, 2005 1:13:58 GMT -5
Post by noob on Sept 8, 2005 1:13:58 GMT -5
A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman, "Give me six double vodkas." The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day."
"Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay."
The next day, the same guy came into the bar and asked for the same drinks. When the bartender asked what the problem was today the answer came back, "I've just found out that my younger brother is gay too!"
On the third day, the guy came into the bar and ordered another six double vodkas. The bartender said, "Jesus! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?"
The man downed the first drink and shook his head, "Yeah, my wife!"
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noob
New Member
Posts: 5
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Funny
Sept 8, 2005 1:18:44 GMT -5
Post by noob on Sept 8, 2005 1:18:44 GMT -5
An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Monte Casino went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said, "Father, during World War II, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the enemy. So I hid her in my attic."
The priest replied, "That was a wonderful thing you did, my son! And you have no need to confess that." "It's worse than that, father. She started to repay me with sexual favors."
The priest said, "By doing that, you were both in great danger. However, two people under those circumstances can be very tempted to act that way. But if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."
"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. But I do have one more question ."
"And what is that?" asked the priest.
"Should I tell her the war is over?"
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Nov 2, 2005 14:29:58 GMT -5
Post by darblustar on Nov 2, 2005 14:29:58 GMT -5
MiMi and DiVa on Halloween ;D MiMi DiVa
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Nov 3, 2005 6:50:20 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Master-{3-D} on Nov 3, 2005 6:50:20 GMT -5
nice
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Nov 3, 2005 12:58:57 GMT -5
Post by brainsdotcom on Nov 3, 2005 12:58:57 GMT -5
you are INSANE woman!!!
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Nov 3, 2005 13:17:58 GMT -5
Post by darblustar on Nov 3, 2005 13:17:58 GMT -5
I am not! Those are my babies! hehe Look at their face though, they are telling me i'm insane as well. :shrug: i dunno
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Nov 4, 2005 4:08:09 GMT -5
Post by brainsdotcom on Nov 4, 2005 4:08:09 GMT -5
i bet your husband wishes you would spend the money getting fancy dresses for you instead of the dogs ;D
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Nov 4, 2005 13:58:39 GMT -5
Post by darblustar on Nov 4, 2005 13:58:39 GMT -5
no he'd rather me not spend money at at
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Nov 4, 2005 14:38:49 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Bear-{3-D} on Nov 4, 2005 14:38:49 GMT -5
Sheesh! I can see why! I only known you a week or so and I already spent 3,000,000 gold on ya today! Maybe we should set up a Pay Pal link for wife relief for poor Dialsoap! ;D
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Funny
Nov 4, 2005 17:39:15 GMT -5
Post by darblustar on Nov 4, 2005 17:39:15 GMT -5
Well I suppose then I shouldn't send this 20 dollars your way for the site hmmmm...sigh new dog clothes
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Funny
Nov 4, 2005 18:04:41 GMT -5
Post by darblustar on Nov 4, 2005 18:04:41 GMT -5
The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for early retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officers got to choose what those two points would be.
The first officer who accepted, asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.
The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with $96,000.
The third one was a grizzly old Captain who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, "From the tip of my thingy to my testicles." It was suggested by the pension man that he may want to reconsider, explaining about the nice checks the previous two officers had received. But the old Captain insisted and they decided to go along with him, providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer.
The medical officer arrived and instructed the Captain to "drop em", which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Captain's thingy and began to work back. "My God!" he suddenly exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?" The Captain calmly replied..."In Vietnam."
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Nov 4, 2005 19:43:37 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Bear-{3-D} on Nov 4, 2005 19:43:37 GMT -5
Just go by my motto....do what feels good....
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Funny
Nov 15, 2005 10:26:15 GMT -5
Post by jazzhound on Nov 15, 2005 10:26:15 GMT -5
Bet New For This Clan...EVER!!! ;D "Researchers: Hops in Beer May Be Healthy The Associated Press Tuesday, November 15, 2005; 7:10 AM CORVALLIS, Ore. -- Hops used to brew beer may have some health benefits but researchers warn against expecting any significant effect by drinking a few cold ones. Scientists at Oregon State University's Linus Pauling Institute have found a class of compounds called flavonids neutralize "free radicals" _ rogue oxygen molecules that can damage cells. One of those flavonids, a compound called xanthohumol, is found only in hops. It may help prevent some forms of cancer, researchers say. Some beers already have higher levels of flavonids than others. The lager and pilsner beers commonly sold in domestic U.S. brews have fairly low levels of these compounds, but some porter, stout and ale brews have much higher levels. Still, the level of the compound in beer is generally considered too low to have any significant preventive effect. "We can't say that drinking beer will help prevent cancer," said Fred Stevens, OSU assistant professor of pharmacy and scientist in the Linus Pauling Institute. Hops, from a flowering plant, are used by brewers as a bittering agent in beer. Xanthohumol is a yellow substance that was first discovered in hops in 1913. But its health effects were not known until the 1990s, when Stevens and colleagues started studying the flavonoid compound. In cell cultures and animal studies, xanthohumol targeted various types of cancer, including breast, colon and ovarian. His original work, along with new developments in the anti-cancer properties of xanthohumol made during the past decade, was reviewed last year in the journal Phytochemistry. Now Stevens is collaborating with fellow Linus Pauling Institute scientist Emily Ho to investigate the effects of the flavonoid on prostate cancer cells. "When we give the flavonoid to cancer cells, it seems to slow their growth, which is what you want to do for cancer," said Ho, who is also an assistant professor in OSUs department of nutrition and exercise sciences. Although the tiny amounts of xanthohumol found in beer have little preventive value, Stevens thinks it may be possible in the future for drug companies to develop pills containing concentrated doses of the flavonoid. ___ Information from: Gazette-Times, www.gtconnect.com" www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/11/15/AR2005111500252.html
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Nov 15, 2005 11:58:15 GMT -5
Post by brainsdotcom on Nov 15, 2005 11:58:15 GMT -5
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Bear is going to live till he is 300
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Funny
Nov 21, 2005 16:05:17 GMT -5
Post by Ruinator on Nov 21, 2005 16:05:17 GMT -5
What operating system are you? Mine came out as..." You are OS2-Warp. You're plagued by feelings of abandonment and disgust for your backstabbing step-brother. Oh, what might have been" click the link to find yours bbspot.com/News/2003/01/os_quiz.php
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Funny
Nov 30, 2005 19:19:26 GMT -5
Post by darblustar on Nov 30, 2005 19:19:26 GMT -5
<a href="http://bbspot.com/News/2003/01/os_quiz.php"><img src="http://www.bbspot.com/Images/News_Features/2003/01/os_quiz/free_bsd.jpg" width="300" height="90" border="0" alt="You are FreeBSD. You're a speed demon and a great networker. You have a tendency to give it away for free. Well-respected, but virtually unknown."><br>Which OS are You?</a>
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Jan 30, 2006 12:06:46 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Bear-{3-D} on Jan 30, 2006 12:06:46 GMT -5
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Mar 15, 2006 15:27:29 GMT -5
Post by *DbD*-Master-{3-D} on Mar 15, 2006 15:27:29 GMT -5
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Mar 15, 2006 18:18:36 GMT -5
Post by brainsdotcom on Mar 15, 2006 18:18:36 GMT -5
lol these are awesome
And where do i pick up my million?
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